CHALLENGES OF LIFE

  Our greatest challenge in life is to be able to make the proper decisions at the right time and to feel comfortable and content with the decisions we make. Very often we have second thoughts on the decisions we make and it often plagues us for fear that we could have made a better decision . The greatest problem we face  is not making the decision and to sit on the middle of the fence of life and live indecisively as life passes us by.  

   As I reflect upon the decisions we make, I recall walking in the city and observing a man in tattered clothing, sketching pictures in chalk on the sidewalk. All day long this 'beggar and artist' worked on his "masterpiece" which, to my naked eye, seemed very good. As I watched, I realized that with a passing shower, this masterpiece would be lost never to be retrieved again. One wonders why he, seemingly wasted his time painting with chalk. However, we realize that it was his decision and he was pleased with a piece of art though it was to be a temporary one. 

Thinking this through, I begin to realize that there are so many people who spend their time on masterpieces in chalk which are scarcely worth the the time and energy expended on them. In life, to be worthwhile, we must determine what things are really important and what truly is permanent and to make the decisions that will permit our actions to have long lasting affect upon ourselves and upon mankind. 

  How true this is, as we read Parshat B'shalach, and recall the story of the Jewish People escaping the onslaught of Pharoah and his army only to face the waters of the Red Sea. For them, life was in the balance, for they could not go backward or go forward.  What should they do and what decision  should they make? 

  At this crucial moment, for עם ישראל, Moshe hears the words of G-D, ויאמר הי אל משה מה תצעק אלי דבר אל בני ישראל ויסעו "Hashem says to Moshe, why do you cry out to me? Speak to the Children of Israel and let them go forth."

  Rashi suggests that G-D was telling Moshe, "Now is not the time for prayer, for the Jewish People are in jeopardy and a decision has to be made. Hashem is telling Moshe to go forward, show your faith and betachon in Hashem and go forward and you will see the saving power of G-D."

   Moshe makes the right decision and the waters part and the Jewish People are saved.  At that moment, standing on the shores of the Red Sea, indecision  would have been fatal. For Moshe and the עם it was not only a leap of faith, but a leap  of life that will encourage them to move forward and to achieve the optimum that life has to offer them. 

  The choice seems to be easy - to be proactive with the hope that our decisions will propel us into the bright and glorious future or to remain stagnant in the quagmire of indecision. 

  The answer depends on how ambitious we are to see our dreams and hopes fulfilled. 

   Are your dreams of better times and a better life ready to be fulfilled and realized, or are you merely a fence sitter?  The answer is simply יסעו, move, act,   be a shaker and a mover in life. 

     As a therapist, I am inclined to suggest that when a big decision is to be made our best bet is to make it from the side of courage rather than from the side of fear. Of course, unnecessary risk taking is foolish, but if life is to be lived fully then saying 'no' to your fears and taking a risk may be the first step to success. I sense that was the way Nachshon, standing at the Red Sea, must have felt as he acted in a decisive matter and jumped into the sea while others were arguing what to do. 

    It takes courage and belief in Hashem to make decisions, but being indecisive is much worse.

  We need to take the plunge in life and be courageous in our decisions and always feel confident that we, with our insight, did the right thing.  

   With the will of G-D and a strong desire to succeed, we will be zocheh to reap the harvest of our efforts. 

                                                   

    

LIGHTS OF LIFE

    Whenever I reflect upon G-D and how He rules the world, I automatically turn to the 'beginning' when The Almighty created the world. My  focus is on Hashem, when the  Torah states ויהי אור and 'Let There Be Light, and G-D saw כי טוב that it was good.  Light for G-D, and eventually for man, is seen as 'Good'.  It is seen as a source of energy that permits our world to function. Even more so, light permits us to see one another. If we lived in a world of darkness, life would not only be lonely but depressing, as well.  Light permits us to see each other and permits us to interact with one another. We can then actualize what Hashem said to Adam in a  general human interactive way,

                                            לא טוב היות אדם לבדו. 

Light, in a more philosophical way, is a story of the truth verses illusion, of the spirit of Hashem verses  anarchy, and of the service of Hashem verses slavery and confinement. 

   How meaningful is this lesson as we read this Shabbat, Parshat Bo, and are introduced to the ninth plague brought upon by the demagogue Pharoah, who refused vehemently to free the Jewish people from bondage. This was the plague of darkness. The Torah describes this darkness as so "thick", that the result was לא ראו איש את אחיו that one was not able to see the other.

 This darkness goes beyond the physical, it reflects upon a social, and a humane blindness which occurs when one person is so involved in himself, that even when another stands in front of him, he cannot see the 'other'. This was a darkness, that affected the hearts of man. Physically, they were able to see, but lacked feelings for others.  They didn't care about their neighbor, and were blind to each other's needs. 

That is the most terrible plague that can ever be visited upon a person and a nation.  Our Judaic way of life requires that we should see each person as a human being who has needs, feelings, fears and  hopes, just as we do. We are all children of G-D and are entitled to be treated with dignity, justice, and compassion that we claim for ourselves. 

  Our  basic challenge that confronts each of us is to keep aglow the light of understanding and caring which enables us to see one another. It is only when we see the humanity in the other, that we can preserve it within ourselves. 

  Martin Buber said it well,"Men become what they are, sons of G-D, by becoming what they are, brothers of their brothers". 

    May we always walk hand in hand in the midst of the light of humanity, and utter the words of Hashem וירא אלוקים את האור כי טוב. The Rav wrote, "Each person is endowed with some degree of this special metaphysical illumination which, inherently, resides in the human personality,and that this clear light will dispel the darkness of inhumanity, and all the hidden potential within the heart of each person will emerge." 

   May we be blessed  with the light of brotherly love always seeing each other in a glorious way. 

                                                 

VOS GEIT MEN TON?

  Rabbi Yisrael Lau, former chief Rabbi of Israel, relates a very interesting story. He came to visit the Lubavicher Rebbe. In the middle of their conversation, the Rebbe asked him, "What are Jews saying these days in Israel." He was concerned because it was right after the 1973 Yom Kippur war. Rabbi Lau replied that Jews are asking each other, 

"Vos vet zein". "What will be"?  

    The Rebbe grasped Rabbi  Lau׳s arm and vehemently said:"Yidden fregen nit vos vet zein; zen fregen, vos geit men ton?"Jews do not ask what will be, they ask, what are we going to do? 

   "What will be? is the question of a victim." "What we are going to do? is a proactive question."

  The question what will be, seems to suggest that there is nothing we can do to change the situation. In truth there is always something very powerful that we can do and towards this positive attitude we proceed to act and find out what are we going to do.  

   Life has many options and we are encouraged to find them and act upon them - always asking what are we going to do?

    Our decision to be involved and to try to find solutions to the many problems we all

face, is to realign our lives with greater spirituality and more introspection into our value system. 

   The Parshiot that we are presently reading, seem to enunciate the many dilemmas that Moshe is faced with as he is instructed to appear before Pharoah, and to utter the word of Hashem, שלח את עמי, "Send forth the Jewish People from slavery and oppression. 

  The message is clear. However, I find myself in a philosophical dilemma, as we read the following dialogue between G-D and Moshe,

  " כי ידבר אליכם פרעה תנו לכם מופת   When Pharoah  speaks to you saying "Provide a wonder for yourselves....." It appears that Hashem did not say to Moshe that Pharoah will ask you,  

"  תנו לי מופת or תנו לעמי מופת, Show me a sign or show my people a sign.Why did Hashem reflect that Pharoah will ask to show yourself a sign?

  The Aznayim L'Torah, exclaims that Pharoah was really saying, שאתם בעצמכם אינכם מאמינים במי ששלח אתכם אלי  that Pharoah would only be impressed and believe that Moshe represents the will of G-D, only when he sees  that Moshe and Aharon are impressed themselves by the power of this Almighty G-D, and therefore he will use the language לכם,you. 

   This is truly a brilliant insight into what a true Judaic life means. For a Jew, in general, to have influence over our modern day Pharoahs, for a Jew to show the world what G-Dly means, then he must be impressed by his own words and by his own deeds as was Moshe facing his arch enemy 

Pharoah. 

    Judaism needs our entire לכם,our entire being to live with great enthusiasm and with tremendous pride that comes when the Jew himself is impressed by his Judaic code and way of life. 

  If we want to get the feeling of self fulfillment which comes from living  a Torah oriented life then we must thrust ourselves completely into the learning of Torah, into the fulfillment of Mitzvos, of making our Shabbat table a מזבח להי, resulting in great joy and spiritual ecstasy. We must act with a greater sense of לכם, of totally involved  without any rationalizations and  being impressed with the beauty and magnificence of Judaism. 

    Our lives and especially the lives of our children, must emphasize the תנו לכם מופת syndrome and to be impressed and to feel a great sense of pride, requiring our loyalty and a boldness in action in all the vicissitudes of Jewish life.

   This way of life as it brought the Yeshuah for Moshe  and עם ישראל, will bring our ישועה במהרה בימינו. 

 

         

  

  

  

WHO ARE WE?

   I have always found the study of biblical personalities interesting and spiritually uplifting. We can learn so much from every one of our Torah leaders - their strengths, their attitude for life, their dedication to K’lall Yisrael, and their deep faith and Emunah in Hashem that continually guided them in all of their life's pursuits.         

   When studied carefully, their way of life becomes our role model to follow in our own personal lives. 

I intuitively, choose as my emulating force, the true Manheeg of Yisrael, Moshe Rabeinu. 

  Though his personality and his way of life from beginning to end is perplexing and even dialectical, however, his essence of life is so magnificent that any questions we may have about his actions falls away very quickly and his life becomes even more glorified in our eyes.

    Moshe’s life pulls on our spiritual strings in a very dynamic way leading us down the primrose path of greater אמונה and בטחון. 

   I remember the story of a boy flying a kite on a very cloudy and misty day. A man passing by stopped to watch him, but because of the mist could not see the kite. He asked the youngster. ”How do you know the kite is still attached to the string?” To which the boy replied, “I may not be able to see the kite, but I can still feel its pull".

   Indeed, in many aspects of our religious life we may not be able to see the person or the object or the idea, but in some very mysterious and miraculous way we can, still, feel the pull on our spiritual lives. 

  This is so true when we speak of our relationship to G-D.  I sense it applies, as well, to the impact that all of the biblical personalities have on our way of life. 

  Let us look at the early stages in the life of Moshe, especially when Hashem meets him at the Burning Bush, and tells him ואשלחך אל פרעה, “I will send you to Pharaoh and to take my people out of bondage.” Upon hearing these words of instruction, Moshe replies מי אנכי כי אלך אל פרעה, “Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh?”

  מי אנכי, are crucial words uttered by Moshe, the designated leader of the Jewish people and I begin to sense and wonder, “Was Moshe going through an "identity crisis"? In my quest to understand  Moshe's response  “Who am I?”, We then begin to realize that the result of the tyranny and the oppression in Egypt brought about a loss of identity by the Jewish Slaves. Slavery takes away a person's individuality. He loses all semblance of human dignity and, more so, human identity. The people cry out, מי אנכי,“Who am I really?”  Moshe saw the anguish and the affliction of the people and he witnessed the madness of the tyranny that the Jews were experiencing. After seeing this degradation, he no longer was an  איש מצרי he now added on a new identity - he was now an עברי. 

   Moshe realized that man cannot survive unless he is able to reaffirm his humanity and this can only be accomplished when he regains his self identity. Moshe, at this point in his life, saw that the Jew was denied his hierarchy. Moshe's aim in life was to return them back to their ancestors and to once again, identify them with Avraham, Yitzchak, Yaakov, Sarah, Rivka, Rachel, and Leah. The task may have seemed way above his capabilities and for that reason he said מי אנכי, 

“ I am not equipped for this great task” To assure him that he was worthy of this job  Hashem assures him that he will always be successful  כי אהיה עמך, “for I will always be with you.” 

     That was the answer for Moshe's quest of  מי אנכי and for any Jew that may have an identity crisis. As long as we take Hashem with us wherever we find ourselves, we will always know that we are worthy of success at any task that He sets before us and for any road we take. With this attitude we will succeed and we will never experience an identity crisis as a Jew.  

    This is our answer for our life's journey. “Walk with G-D and success is ours.” 

  

  This idea has greater meaning for me as our family commemorates the Yarzeit of our beloved mother and grandmother and great-grandmother ריבה בת יחיאל ונעכה, Rae Mehlman.

  Her life was very meaningful, as a devoted daughter, a beloved wife to our Father Ernest, and an adored mother and grandmother and great-grandmother.  Our mother never experienced an identity crisis , she always acted as our אשת חיל, a true woman of valor, whose life was completely devoted to her family and extended herself to others with much גמילת חסדים, and who brought into our home four Yeshiva Bachurim who needed a Yiddishe home environment. This was our mother whose love and caring I miss very much, and who left us a magnificent legacy that continues to inspire our family on a daily basis.

May her memory be a Blessing to her family and K’lall Yisrael. 

 

Remember well, our quest for an answer to מי אנכי can be realized in a positive way when Hashem  graces our midst.